Blog

By Victoria Ostrosky

We all know about King David. The shepherd who became King and defeated Goliath with a single stone. He also left behind the most beloved psalms in mankind’s history.  He was described as a ‘man after God’s own heart’ for a reason. He endured much heartache and loss, enriching us with his deeply honest prayers.

Monica Guajardo and her husband moved to Santa Rosa Beach in July of 2024.  Two years earlier they were living in San Antonio.  Her elderly parents became ill, and she watched as first her mother, then six weeks later her father, entered heaven.  She nursed them as their health deteriorated.  Monica began feeling overwhelmed with attending two funerals weeks apart, then clearing out her parents’ home and their belongings, with all the accompanying memories.  She thought she was doing fine and holding up well.

“When I got back to San Antonio, I had an anxiety attack.”  She was shocked when the doctor at urgent care recommended a psychiatrist and medication.  Being a nurse, she balked at the idea, but at her husband’s insistence, she agreed.  “I found an incredible psychiatrist and was put on medication for about a year to help my brain come down.”

Anxiety attacks and feeling overwhelmed are your body’s way of telling you to seek help.  “It’s ok to see a doctor and counselor.  They have ways to help you with tools and techniques to help reorganize your brain.”  Monica learned the importance of prayer and soaking in the Word.  Her grief at times was debilitating, but she learned that grief is an essential part of the healing process.

The Psalmist David lamented in Psalm 43:5: “Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me?  Hope in God; for I shall again praise Him, my salvation and my God.”

Journaling, reading the Bible, making lists and memorizing verses, then repeating them to herself, made the difference in Monica’s recovery.  Meditation and memorizing scripture cleared her brain, and hiding the Word in her heart gave her the tools she needed.  “During episodes, I would go to my prayer closet and quote scriptures I had memorized.  I didn’t feel it at the time during meditation and prayer, but I believed in faith.”  Those promises in scripture that God would bring peace in times of trouble rang true for Monica.  “God came through and brought peace to get through it.”

Who else can accurately express the pain of loss and fear, but someone with intimate knowledge?  David, in the first two verses of Psalm 77 says, “I cry aloud to God, aloud to God, and He will hear me.  In the day of my trouble I seek the Lord; In the night my hand is stretched out without wearying…”.  But it doesn’t end there.  Verses 11 and 12 follow closely. “I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember your wonders of old.  I will ponder all your work and meditate on your mighty deeds.”

Thankfulness and gratefulness are essential components of healing.  Monica expresses it this way: “Healing comes through knowing the Word, learning about God and His nature and getting the mind of Christ. You end up becoming so much stronger.  It’s not just what we go through, but it’s about helping others know they’re not alone.”

For anyone experiencing anxiety and grief, Monica encourages you to reach out for help.  “Get the support you need.  Go to church, read the Word.  Get that therapist.  Anxiety causes anxiety.  You can get a vicious cycle.” Her solution is to enter your prayer closet and read the verses you have written in your journal – remind yourself of God’s love for you and His faithfulness.

Monica’s prescription? “Find the joy.  Keep a gratitude list.  Thanksgiving is the secret.  It will give you a balanced mind.”

One of her favorite verses is Philippians 4:6-7: “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

You can listen to Monica Guajardo’s entire interview and many other incredible stories on the weekly Road to Redemption radio show and podcast at www.rtrdestiny.com.

Views: 5

By Kirk McCarley

The notion of traveling through time has long captivated my imagination.  From the Jay Ward produced cartoons that introduced us to historian canine, Peabody, and his pupil, Sherman, to the more sophisticated drama of fictional time travelers, Tony Newman and Doug Phillips from the Time Tunnel TV show, the concept provokes fascination at the “what if?”

Peabody’s student, Sherman

What if we really could take a vehicle back in time?  What time would you go to?  Even if it were possible, would you even be accepted in that era given your current knowledge and understanding?  Or might you be considered a lunatic, arrested, locked up and put away, or even worse?

Mr. Peabody

We are sometimes asked what advice we would have given the younger version of ourselves if we were in fact afforded the opportunity to travel back.  What would we say?

• Don’t be afraid to try new things.
• Rejection is sometimes redirection.
• Take risks.
• Stop caring what other people think.
• Travel and spend your money on experiences not things, you can’t take that dress with you when you die.

Regrets, things said that I wish I had not said, things not said that I should have said, reactions and over reactions.

Traveling through the Time Tunnel.  

On Friday, November 22, 1963, I was in my first grade classroom.  In a little while we’d be dismissed to go home to cartoons that afternoon and whatever activities the weekend would bring.  Thanksgiving was next week!

In Fort Worth, Texas shortly after lunchtime, we were advised that our President had just been assassinated.  I did not even know what that word meant but I do recall that in short order we were ordered to be picked up by our parents and ushered home.  President Kennedy had just given a speech at our very own Fort Worth Hotel Texas that morning, before traveling to Dallas.  I remember being sad, but even more disheartened that all my afternoon cartoons had been preempted.

Though only seven years old at the time, I regret having not fully appreciated the full scope of that historical event.

In 1980 I was in my first professional job out of college as a Personnel Director at a manufacturing plant.  There was an industrial injury and major one at that–during an annealing (metal texturing process) an employee became literally inflamed.  Panic-stricken he ran, further exacerbating the blaze.  Burned over 90% of his body, he painfully endured 18 more days before finally succumbing.

I visited him in the hospital and watched him writhe in unfathomable pain.  I regretted having no words of comfort or encouragement, whatsoever.

What we would give to do it all over–or maybe not.

In 1963 I was a kid.  How unfair to myself to have thought I was supposed to have the intellectual capacity to process such a milestone event of the 20th century?  Instead, how about considering myself fortunate to have witnessed such a dark and tragic history and recalled the parts that I have?

Seventeen years later as I watched my fellow worker suffer and writhe, might that have been an event for which words were woefully inadequate anyway?  What’s to say that what would have been uttered would be meaningful, or even appropriate?

In reflection would my younger self have even heeded the advice and wisdom of my current version?  Maybe, but more likely not.  Had I followed those instructions would I be in better standing?  Once again, it is possible, but I’ll accept where chance and circumstance provided delivery laughing at many more foibles and indiscretions that have brought me to today.  Sure, I could have undoubtedly made stronger choices.  Yet, there’s a peace with how it’s all turned out so far.

I’ll take it.

Views: 4

By Stephenie Craig

You’re back to a new year with resolutions to overhaul areas of life. Maybe you’re back to the gym or back to morning practices or back to church, crossing your fingers you can keep it going longer than last year.

While the idea of positive life change is helpful, resolutions are often missing a key ingredient to make them truly life impacting. Why does the resolution matter? Why are you trying to change? Are you changing because someone judged you, you don’t feel enough, you’re jealous of someone else? Are you changing because you have something to prove, you want better photos to post, you’re seeking approval? Judgement, shame, and approval seeking will only drive change for short periods of time. If you want long-term life change, it’s time to ask a different question.

What do you want, really?

When you get to the end of life and reflect back on how you lived, what you made important, how you invested your energy, what do you want to be true about the person you’ve been and the way you lived your life? What do you want, really?

8 Steps to Figure Out What You Want, Really

1. Ask yourself what you want, really. Brainstorm what you want. “I want to double my current income.”
2. Ask yourself, “What will that get you?” What will doubling your income get you? It will give me more freedom for family vacations. What will more family vacations get you? More vacations will give me more time with my family. What will more time with your family get you? More time with family will help me know what’s going on with my kids beyond grades and activities. And what will knowing what’s going on with your kids more get you? It will get me more authentic, connected relationship with them so they know I really want to know them.
3. Follow the “What will that get you?” question to the deeper desires and values. Name your desires and values. What I want really is to have an authentic, connected relationship with my kids and for them to know I really want to know them.
4. Clarify what you want, really. So, it’s not really that I want to double my income (while that would be nice), what I really want is deeper, more connected relationships in my family.
5. Orient your priorities and choices toward what you really want. Try using reminders in your phone and post it notes for several weeks to remember your value/desire. How am I scheduling my time this week to prioritize more meaningful connection with my family? How are we considering family connections when we sign up for family activities? How am I putting boundaries around my phone time to prioritize family connection? How am I showing up in conversations with my family this week? What will I choose to say no to so I can say yes to what I really want?
6. Determine how you will measure your progress at the end of 2025. How will you know if you have engaged in more authentic, connected relationships with your kids and shown that you really want to know them? I will know based on how much they share about their lives outside of grades/sport. I will know based on average face to face time spent talking or having fun together each week. I will know based on how affectionate we are or how much we laugh together.
7. Celebrate progress or evaluate lack of progress. If you made progress in living toward what you want, enjoy and continue to lean into change. If you don’t see the progress you were hoping for, identify the one thing that prevented progress the most. Distraction with work on my phone during family time was the one thing that prevented progress the most.
8. Determine the one thing you can commit to that will most likely move you toward what you really want. I will create a phone/email boundary from 5-9 so I can be more present with family in the evenings.

Approaching personal growth from your deeper values drives long-term change much more effectively than trying to live up to an external standard. Remember that orienting your life habits to your values takes time and commitment and is very worth the work. Connect with us along your journey for counseling and coaching at Journeybravely.com.

Views: 3

By Rev. Pete Hyde

The old car rolled to a slow stop at a bleak and abandoned intersection in the “middle of nowhere.”  The dust from the dirt road boiled up around the car as the driver looked down at his quickly scribbled instructions.  Had he come four miles or five?  Perhaps it was only three because he was paying more attention to the talk show on the radio than keeping track of the miles.  Only a couple of things were certain.  He was going north out of town and he needed to turn west and travel five miles to get to his destination.  But he had lost count of how far he had come.  What now?  There are no street signs on dirt and gravel section-line roads – only rows of wooden, barbed-wire fence posts heading in parallel rows in all four directions, all the way to the horizon.

A white-face steer looked up from his lazy grazing like an old man looking up from his paper as he sits on the park bench watching tourists try to find their way through town.  The old steer almost seemed to smile through his cud-chewing as the car sat at the crossroads containing a confused, lost driver.  Almost in desperation, the driver uttered a half-hearted prayer, “O Lord, which way am I supposed to go?” not really expecting an answer.  The old steer just snorted and returned to his grazing.

We have all sat at lost, deserted, empty crossroads having lost count of the miles we have traveled and not sure where to turn.  We might have even scribbled a few notes to help us on our way, but even those have become more of a hindrance than a help.  We sit lost and alone gazing to the horizon in all directions seeking just one point of familiarity – one thing that would give us a clue of where we are and where we’re supposed to go.

We have all uttered that prayer:  “O, Lord which way am I supposed to go?”   It might have been more of a statement made in anger and frustration.   We may not have meant it as prayer at all and uttered it as an angry rhetorical question.   We may have not really been expecting an answer in any form.  But, depending on the situation, the question may have been a true pleading with God to give us an answer and guide us in a decision at a critical crossroads in our lives.  We may have been at the point of throwing up our hands in desperation and anger at God or anyone who even looked the least bit like they cared and exclaimed at the top of our voice with our fist shaking in the air:

O LORD, WHICH WAY AM I SUPPOSED TO GO?  You gave Moses a burning bush.  You called Peter to step out of the boat and walk on water.  You calmed a storm more than once.  You fed the five thousand.  You carried Jonah to Nineveh.  You gave a clear message to the prophets.  You told the disciples what was going to happen in Jerusalem.  You say you know the number of hairs on my head.  You say you know when even a sparrow falls from the sky.  Lord, I am sitting here at a crossroad not knowing which way to turn.  Couldn’t you just tell me, show me, guide me?  Why did you make this so difficult?  You did it for others, why can’t you just do it for me?”

The worn, tattered bible on the front seat rustles in the wind.  The noise distracts his ponderings and pleadings.  He glances down at the open page.  “Do you not know?  Have you not heard?  The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired or weary and his understanding no one can fathom.  He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.  Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men will tumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will mount up on wings like eagles’ they will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” (Isaiah 40: 28-31)

He quickly wipes a tear running down his cheek as an old battered pick-up pulls up next to him.  “You lost son?”

“Boy am I lost!” was the reply.

“Who you lookin’ for?”

“I’m headed to the Haines’.”

“One more mile north, then west five.  House is on the north side.  White pick-up parked in the drive.  Jack will be glad to see you!”

The old, white-face steer picks up his head and almost smiles again, turns and ambles his way to a new spot in the pasture.

May you be blessed on your journey.

Rev. Pete Hyde serves as chaplain with the South Walton Fire District

Views: 3