By Victoria Ostrosky
Valerie Peterson, a licensed mental health counselor in Destin, shares important and encouraging words that should touch all of us. Valerie understands that how we think and what we think directly affects us in our daily lives. “Where the mind leads, the rest of us follows.”
We could draw a parallel to what is going on right now across the world – people who have filled their minds and hearts with victimhood, anger, and hate have taken to the streets in large numbers to protest against Israel and the Jews. Their hearts are so consumed by anger they refuse to see the true tragedy and brutality of the massacre on October 7. But the beautiful thing is this – we always have the ability to change and grow and become better people.
In Valerie’s practice, she encourages her clients to “be aware of what you’re saying to yourself about your day. What is the number one thought that could hold you back – what is your replacement thought to carry on?” She understands the value of scripture meditation and memorization. God told Joshua and the children of Israel to meditate on His words day and night and to teach them to their children. As 2 Corinthians 10:5 says: “we take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ.”
In her sessions, she recommends that her clients write down one scripture verse and think about it during the day as a way of meditating on the Word. “Think of a butterfly,” Valerie says, “we can stop defeating thoughts and replace them with something good. Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
Valerie also correlates how when we are feeling sad or depressed, we need to reflect on what we are saying about ourselves in that situation. It’s not that those things are bad, but we need to recognize that our thoughts affect how we feel. Being aware of how our thinking shapes our lives gives us the starting point to make the necessary changes.
As we know, thoughts and feelings go hand in hand.
When it comes to grieving, it is a process, not a specific event. Valerie encourages us to not only find others to walk with us through our journey of grief but on the flip side – those of us with friends and family who are grieving need to come alongside and just be there. “Acknowledging that you are going through loss and having people you can be open with is important.”
One key point Valerie makes about the loss journey that can be so overwhelming is this: “Stay in today. Keep your thoughts and mind on today during significant loss. Don’t worry about tomorrow.”
During our grief journey, there are days when we feel overwhelmed with emotion. As Valerie says, “God wired us to grieve, so set aside prescribed times to grieve. Maybe write your loved one a letter or do creative things to help you through the grieving process.”
There are many Psalms of sorrow, pain and grief that can also encourage us. Reading these songs of David out loud can bring tremendous comfort. “God sometimes takes us through fire and water, but He won’t leave us in it.”
“As you walk through the grieving process, don’t get stuck in any one stage. The time will come when you’re ready to release your loved one into God’s care and then you can see yourself as a living legacy of them.”
Weeping with those who weep, and mourning with those who mourn is part of everyone’s calling at different times in life. There’s something very powerful when the person in pain knows they’re not alone, and that someone else cares about their grief.
You can hear Valerie Peterson’s entire interview and listen to many other incredible stories on the weekly Road to Redemption radio show and podcast at www.rtrdestiny.com
Author: Sowal Editor
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